My Aunt Carole gave
me a Mary Engelbreit Book of Days Calendar when I graduated from high
school. I took this beautiful book to college with me and began
recording moments that became known as “Book of Days” days. The
moments that made it into the book had a different feel than normal
good days. They shimmered. They were never the big days in our
lives. They reminded us how happy we were to be alive, and that life is good.
I had a lot of
those days in college when pressure came in the form of homework and
getting a job in the far off future. A mortgage, sleep-deprived
parenting, and office politics have made Book of Days days far less
frequent. Until this past Saturday.
Saturday was an
all-around good day: the Salvation Army came to pick up a furniture
donation and for a nominal fee, the driver agreed to haul away the
other items that needed to be trashed. Later on our walk to gather
kindling for the evening's fire pit, our neighbor offered to cut up
brush from his neighbor's yard.
These small
gestures loomed large for me and were building momentum to make this
a really great day. All of this was in preparation to welcome four
college students to our home for dinner. I had signed up as a
Homeplate Program Family at the University where I work.
Cadence and I
pulled up to our meeting spot on campus. There was music playing and
a lot of students milling around. I had a moment of self-doubt. How
will I ever find our students in this crowd? What was I thinking
inviting strangers for dinner? Suddenly three students with eager
faces approached our car. I rolled down my window and asked, “Are
you waiting to be picked up for the Homeplate Program?” They
nodded.
“Are you ready to
hang with the Mahoney girls?” They smiled.
We introduced
ourselves and waited for the fourth student.
There are times
when you instantly know you've found members of your tribe. This was
that moment. I explained that the program encouraged the families to
host the students 2-3 times a semester and I invited them to go ice
skating with us and I wondered if they'd like to help us decorate our
Christmas tree when the time came.
They gasped and
said “Yes!” in unison.
We loaded up in my
Pathfinder when their friend joined us.
There was never an
awkward moment. Cadence got the conversational ball rolling by
telling them that we'd gone to Taylor Swift's concert this week.
Then we started talking about musicians we loved and groups we'd
seen. Pentatonix came into the conversation. We heard about how
great they were in concert. I offered to dig out our Christmas CD
when we got home. There was a resounding, “Yes!”
At home, our dinner
prep began immediately. I listed the to-do items and everyone took a
job. We pre-heated the oven and Kayla got to work on making
cornbread. Emily got to work on chopping veggies for the salad. Jay
and Zach were left with the enchilada assembly. I went searching for
the Pentatonix CD.
The music came on
and my kitchen filled with singing. It was joyous. I was so glad
I'd planned for us to make dinner together rather than stressing
about making something in advance. We sang and talked and cleaned up
as our dinner baked. I marveled at how it was possible that these four students remained strangers to us for about two seconds.
Cadence made
surprise name cards for our guests and set the table. These sweet
students filled their plates high with the gorgeous meal we made
together. And we dove in. We agreed that food tasted better when it
was made together. I shared with the group that I had had town
parents when I was in college and what a difference they had made in
my college experience. I told them that I'd like to offer myself as
a resource to them—a home-away-from-home. We ate and talked and
smiled.
We admitted that
we'd been excited for the evening, but nervous about the strangers we
were going to spend the evening with. At one point, Kayla said, “You
know that part at the end of The Grinch Who Stole Christmas?
Where he says his heart grew five times bigger?” She gestured to
her heart. “That's how I feel right now.”
“Me
too!” I exclaimed. Book of Days day, indeed!
The
rest of our evening included s'mores by the firepit, a reading of a
Pete the Cat Valentine's Day book by Zach, whose work study is
working with second graders, and a game of Chinese Checkers. I
watched these students as they interacted with each other. I thought
about my own college days and the friendships that were forged in the
first days of my freshman year. I thought about how these four will
feel a special bond for the rest of their lives—no matter where
life takes them.
I
thought about the fact that I could be each of these 18 year-olds'
mother. How they were ten when my daughter was born. How my family's
circle of friends had just expanded. How they had treated my school-ager with kindness. I had prayed that this would be
an enjoyable evening for everyone. My prayers were answered. My cup
was overflowing.
We
drove them back to campus with plans for our next visit and the
standing offer to reach out if there was any way I could help them.
Cadence
woke up the next morning and declared, “I love those college
students.”
My
sentiments exactly.
I just love that you did this and clearly the students did too. :) This reminds me of the kind of environment my son is living in now. Even though it's boarding school and not college, he's still living away from home and so it's nice to know there are other adults you can rely on who are nearby. In his case, it's the teachers, coaches and advisors, who all live on campus and open their homes to the students. My son has only been there 3 weeks, but he's already had dinner in his basketball coach's home and his academic advisor's home, along with their families. How fortunate that you live near a college and can do this - I can see how everyone benefitted from the experience, including Cadence.
ReplyDeleteI was raised on a farm. My best memories were having exchange students or missionaries staying in our home. It gave me the gift of hostessing and the desire to reach out to others like this.
ReplyDeleteMy family wasn't one that hosted many people in our home. I think that's why this experience was so profound. Extending hospitality feels really good and I'm so glad my daughter has an opportunity to experience it and I have an opportunity to get better at doing it.
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